- BEFORE YOU ASK
Yes, It’s About the Mammoths.
We know you have questions. We’ve prepared answers—some serious, some less serious, and all considerably more complicated than a cave drawing.
faq
Frequently Asked Questions
Are you serious?
We are disappointed that this question continues to be asked in 2026.
Why cavemen?
The Coalition generally prefers the term Paleolithic hunter-gatherer communities. ‘Caveman’ remains widely used, but it can inaccurately imply that all prehistoric peoples resided exclusively in caves.
Isn't fifteen thousand years too long ago?
Time is a measurement. Justice is a principle.
Who would pay?
That is precisely why Congress must establish a commission.
How much are you demanding?
Any responsible figure must account for land values, lost hunting opportunities, accumulated interest, inflation, mammoth scarcity, and approximately six hundred generations of unresolved claims. We refuse to trivialize this calculation by guessing.
Do you want people to live in caves?
We reject this reductive framing. We support housing choice, housing affordability, and housing that respects the full range of human architectural traditions, including geological ones.
Why are woolly mammoths part of a reparations movement?
For communities whose economies and cultures developed alongside megafauna, habitat justice and historical justice cannot be artificially separated.
Are mammoths extinct?
At present.
Why aren't your representatives dressed like cavemen?
Our ancestors adapted to the technologies available to them. So do we. Coalition representatives observe professional business attire standards.
Does the Coalition endorse stereotypical caveman costumes?
No. Clubs, fake animal skins, exaggerated grunting, and similar caricatures trivialize complex prehistoric communities and are inconsistent with Coalition event standards.
When will I receive my reparations?
The precise timetable has not yet been established. After approximately 15,000 years of delay, the Coalition understands the frustration of applicants who are being asked to wait longer. We are working to accelerate the process.
What if Congress refuses to authorize reparations?
The Coalition does not regard continued inaction as a permanent policy solution.
Why do I need to keep my classification number?
Submitted genetic files are deleted after classification. Your classification number preserves your place in the process. When reparations enter the distribution phase, additional documentation or resubmission may be required.
Who qualifies to participate in Paleolithic attire culture?
Eligibility will be determined pursuant to Coalition standards for sufficient caveman descent. Applicants should not assume eligibility merely because attire has become widespread.